


Stories and Memories

by smolflowerprince



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Immortal Merlin, M/M, Modern AU, bookstore
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-27
Updated: 2015-09-30
Packaged: 2018-04-23 14:20:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4880152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolflowerprince/pseuds/smolflowerprince
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin has been stuck roaming the Earth, waiting for Arthur's return or so he believed that is what his destiny wanted him to await. It is modern times and Merlin is working in a used bookstore. A familiar individual steps into his shop, but someone he definitely least expected- Mordred.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. An Unexpected Customer

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry this chapter might have been a little slow. I will try to update frequently. I hope you enjoy!

Centuries have passed since Merlin last saw Arthur, since Camelot still stood. He wondered what his purpose was, why he was still alive. Centuries searching, but for what? For Arthur? He’s been searching so long, but he’s found nothing. No one. But what can he do? Give up? He can’t die. He doesn’t age, not without a spell. What is he supposed to do? He continues waiting, adapting to the modern world as it advances and evolves. He survives.

* * *

 

In this day and age, Merlin has acquired a small used bookstore in the edge of a small town in England. He’s owned the place for about ten years now. He’s named it “Kilgharrah books and enchantments” It isn’t the most popular place but is visited frequently by people who happen to be passing by and he gains a fair amount of money. He lived close enough to walk there and back, which was usually his way of transportation.

Today he had gotten up at about 8 am, which gave him enough time to go on with his usual morning routine before he has to walk the shop to open up. He got up and dressed. He wore jeans, a navy blue button up shirt, and of course a red neckerchief. The warlock kneeled down slightly to pick up the phone rested on his nightstand and slipped the device into the right pocket of his jeans. He walked out of his room and to his kitchen, then made himself a cup of tea and a slice of toast with a fried egg. After finishing his small breakfast, he stood up and began putting his dishes in the sink. He washed his hands and let the water rinse over the dirty dishes. _I’ll clean these when I’m back…_ He thought to himself, drying his hands on a white towel beside the sink.

He reached into his pocket, pulling out his phone and switching it on to check the time. It was almost 8:45, around the time he’d start walking to the shop. He put the phone back in his pocket, and headed to the door. He slipped his shoes on, a pair of blue converse, and reached for his jacket, which was hanging on the coat rack on the left of the door along with his bag. He slipped the leather jacket and then hung the bag on his shoulder. Merlin checked if to see if he had forgotten anything, before walking out the door and locking it behind him. He began walking down the steps of his house and began on his way to the bookstore.

Nearly 30 minutes had passed, and Merlin had reached Kilgharrah books. He reached into his bag and rummaged for a couple of seconds before pulling out a little chain with his keys attacked. He picked out the right key and poked it into the lock and turned. Merlin turned the door handle and pushed the door open, walking inside. He gently closed the door behind him and switched on the lights. The air was slightly dusty, causing the warlock to cough. Knowing no one was there to see, he let his eyes flash a glowing gold. The air had cleared. "That's better..." he mumbled. There was still about half an hour worth of time left before Merlin had planned to open up shop. He set his bag by the register and cleared his space. Merlin had cleaned a bit in the time being. When it was time to open up, he flipped the sign on the door from “closed” to “open”.

No one had entered in the first hour or so. Merlin was occupied organizing books onto the shelves and occasionally reading through a bit as well. It wasn’t until around noon, people started coming in. There was always the usual customers that came in weekly, just a few, but it was always nice. Some would stay a long time gliding through the halls and searching the shelves, some would sit and read, Merlin thought it was always interesting noticing all the different types of people.

The door opened again, making a bell to jingle. Merlin looked up from the register to greet whoever had walked in but as he saw who it was, he went pale. A young man stood there, he had pale skin, brunette hair, and his eyes were a sky blue. Merlin knew who it was, hundreds of years and he still recognises that face, those eyes. It was Mordred. But how could it be? Why him? It could have been anyone anyone but why him?

“Um... are you alright, sir?” the boy asked. Merlin was frozen. _No no NO…! What is he doing here?! Why is he alive?!_ He thought. He felt a chill crawl up his spine. “Sir…?” Mordred muttered, slowly waving his hand in front of the older man’s face. Merlin blinked and stepped out of his chair, still staying silent. _Say something, you idiot!_ He told himself in his mind, _Shit, what do I do???_

Merlin coughed. “Yes, sorry…” he took a step back, trying to keep his distance. He must not remember anything. Unless he’s acting, but would that really be like him? he wondered. “Your name wouldn’t happen to be Mordred, would it?” Merlin asked, biting his lip nervously. The younger man looked up at the taller man with slight suspicion. “Yes that is my name, how did you know? Have we met before?”

 _oh hell, we’ve met that’s for sure._ he wanted to say, but the warlock just shook his head. “Ah, um… yeah, we must have. You haven’t came in here before have you?” he said, with a nervous chuckle. Mordred gave a small smile and shook his head, “I’m afraid not, Sir. It’s my first time walking in here.” Merlin tried smiling back, but he couldn’t fight the bitter feeling forming in his gut. “I see... “ he nodded. Mordred fiddled with his sleeve. “Um… well… I’ll just look around now if that’s alright…” the young man said, slowly walking towards the shelves. “Oh, right, yeah, go ahead…” Merlin responded, not meaning to sound so uneasy. Mordred smiled awkwardly and scurried away. Merlin sighed and sat back down.

_What do I do?_

That night, Merlin couldn’t sleep. He kept getting flashes of Mordred, from the past. The cries and pleading for help from the druid child, echoing in his mind once again, haunting him. The wrath and anger in the traitor’s eyes. But also the kindness, the kindness he had shown. Merlin was always told not to trust him, but in truth Mordred was just a boy. He didn’t carry the burden of a great destiny, he had no knowing of the worst that would happen. Merlin cried into the pillow next to him. Maybe if I just trusted him… Maybe the Disir would… Maybe Arthur would be… He felt a pain in his throat and he whimpered, choking on his tears. He shook his head and gulped. No… I can’t change the past… Why is he here? he thought, wiping the tears from his eyes. He spent the night, pondering and eventually passing out in the last 4 hours before he’d have to wake again.


	2. An Old Name

Merlin has kept the shop closed for nearly a week after his meet with Mordred. He needed the time to think, to make sense of what was going on, though he didn't find much. He couldn't keep the place abandoned for long. He would have to face the risk of running into Mordred again, and he knew he would. Merlin knew he wasn't going to be able to just hide from this. He knew there was a reason that Mordred came back, he wasn't sure why, but it couldn't just be a coincidence for him to walk into Merlin's shop centuries after his death. 

Merlin had walked to the shop again. He wasn't having the greatest morning and he didn't have much of a breakfast, just tea. He hasn't eaten much in the past week, being too stressed. He opened the door to his bookstore once again, the air dustier than normal. A lot of the books were old, as well as the building which collected dust easily. Merlin sighed and cleared it with magic as he usually did. Merlin did well to hide his gifts, as he had his entire life. Though, he has worked as a street magician a couple of times. Now he just uses it for little things that aren't too noticeable.

Not as many customers showed up, most probably expected it to be closed again. Merlin was questioned a few times by the people that did walk in, on why he hadn't opened in the past week. though he wasn't sure how to answer, and just told them he was ill. And just as he thought the day had gone smoothly, Merlin's quiet was intruded. the bell on the door rung again from the front of the room.

"Hello, again... You're open, right?" 

It was Mordred again. Merlin sighed quietly and nodded. Mordred smiled and cautiously stepped in. "My... um... My name's Merlin by the way." Merlin blurted before Mordred could walk past him. Mordred stopped and looked at him, "It's nice to meet you, Em- I mean Merlin." He stopped himself, "I'm sorry. Merlin. Don't know why I wanted to say a different name" he laughed, looking embarrassed and rubbing the back of his neck. Merlin bit his lip.  _Emrys. He was going to say Emrys, wasn't he? Is he pretending or does he really not remember?_ Merlin thought. He let out a chuckle, "It's fine... What brings you here to my shop?" Merlin asked. Mordred shrugged, "I moved here just a month ago and, I don't know, I just happened to come across it and I like books so... yeah. It's a lovely place, by the way." 

"I see." Merlin smiled a little, "Thank you. well, you don't have to stay and chat with me." 

"Oh I don't mind it, but, um, okay." Mordred mumbled. there was a silence between them, before Mordred decided to walk off to the books. Merlin sighed again, sitting in his chair and holding his head. "What should I do...?" he mumbled, accidentally thinking out loud. He stood up and walked down through one of the halls of shelves. There was only one or two other customers in the shop at the moment, and Merlin was sure they'd be a while. He was looking for Mordred, and eventually found him. He started looking at the books on the shelves, pretending to fix the order, slowly making his way closer to the young man who seemed to be focused on reading titles.  _  
_

"Looking for something specific?"

Mordred jumped a little, startled. "I, um, no-" 

Merlin chuckled, "Alright, just checking."

Mordred smiled shyly, "That's kind of you."

"Are you sure I can't help you find anything?" Merlin asked.

Mordred shook his head, "No, I'm fine! Thank you though." he insisted. Merlin nodded, "Alight, well I'm always here."

Later after a couple of minutes, Mordred had come back to the register. He had  book on Arthurian Legends in his hands and set it on the counter. Merlin bit his lip and his heart raced, but he tried to act as normal as possible. "So... Arthurian Legends, huh?" he said, trying not to sound so nervous. Mordred nodded, "Other then my name being Mordred, I guess I just find it interesting." he muttered, "Ha, it's sort of silly, you know? I haven't really thought about it until right now, but 'Mordred' and 'Merlin'. Strange coincidence, right?" 

Merlin nodded slowly, "I think they've got a lot of it wrong, honestly." he said while scanning the boom. 

"Huh?"

"What? oh, nothing. I just think some parts of the legends people have in books today aren't very accurate." 

"Well, they are legends..." 

"Right. um, that will be €5.35" Merlin interrupted, stopping himself from continuing. "Oh, um..." Mordred searched his pockets, pulling out his wallet and handing the cash to Merlin. "Thank you..." Merlin mumbled, opening the register and sorting the money, handing a couple pennies worth of change to Mordred. The boy smiled.

"Thank you Emry-" he stopped himself, "Merlin! Ah! I'm sorry, I keep wanting to say your name differently, I don't know why I just-"

Merlin sighed, "It's... It's okay, just... Goodbye then."

A weird feeling came across Mordred, "I'm sorry, I'll just... I'll just go..." He didn't know why he kept wanting to call the man "Emrys" instead of "Merlin". He wasn't sure why it felt like a big deal, when it shouldn't. He left quickly, everything feeling so strange. Almost as if he had forgotten something important, but he just couldn't remember what it was. He tried shaking the feeling, but it just lingered on for the rest of the day. 


	3. Getting to Know Each Other

Mordred has begun to visit Kilgharrah books often, at least once a week. He didn’t always buy anything, he just liked looking around mostly. Merlin grew a bit more comfortable with Mordred being there. It was hard for him to admit, but he actually began to like him being there. Merlin wondered if maybe it was just because he’s missed Camelot. He missed everyone, all his friends; Arthur, Gwen, Gaius, the Knights, even Morgana at some points.

He was lonely. And he knew it couldn’t just be a coincidence that Mordred just happened to walk into Merlin’s bookstore centuries after his death, and with no memory of it. There had to be a reason. Whether it be some challenge casted down onto Merlin’s destiny, a sign that there was more ‘ghosts’ to show up, a second chance, the same thing happening all over again, good or bad, it had to mean something.

Though there was something different about Mordred. Merlin thought he should hate him or seek revenge, but he couldn’t. Maybe it was the fact that Arthur was gone and Mordred isn’t a threat, maybe it was his loss of the memory that any of that even happened. The more Merlin tried to make sense of it all, the less it made.

This day, it was Merlin’s day off. He took the time to sleep in, and took a walk in the afternoon, not to his work or to town, but just along the trail near his home. He went on these strolls often, when he had the time to. It was peaceful and helped take his mind off of things.

Merlin suddenly got lost in thought, not really paying attention to his surroundings, and ran into something, and falling.   
“ow watch where you’re going, mate-”

No, not something, someone. He got up, apologizing, then looked at who it was. Mordred again. _Why on earth do we keep bumping into each other? Literally??_

Merlin helped him up. “Sorry about that.” He said. Mordred just sighed irritably and brushed the dirt off of his clothes. “It’s fine. Just watch where you’re going next time- hey,” he looked at Merlin, recognizing him, “you’re the guy from that bookstore! Sorry, um, Merlin I mean. Hello again.” he said, with a hint of excitement in his voice. Merlin nodded, “Yep, that’s me. And I remember, you’re Mordred.”

Mordred chuckled, “Well… that was an awkward way of _running into you_ again.”

Merlin laughed. “Right, sorry for that again.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine. so… would you like to walk together?” Mordred asked. Merlin nodded, and they both started walking again. There was an awkward silence between them for the first couple of seconds, but Merlin broke it.

“Sooo… Why do you read the books you do? What about it interests you?” He knew it wasn’t the greatest question, and he probably asks similar ones way too often, but it was all he had. Mordred shrugged, “I don’t know, honestly. I’m just drawn to it,” he looked up at Merlin, “You always seem to question the books I read whenever you see me.” he finished. “I guess so. I work in a bookstore though, so it shouldn’t be that surprising.”

“And what about you? What are you interested in?” the shorter man asked. Merlin stopped to think before responding, “I don’t know. I like books, but they aren’t the only thing I’m interested in. hm, good question.”

Mordred hummed silently, thinkinking of something else to say. “Do you have a girlfriend? boyfriend perhaps?”

Merlin furrowed his brow. _Why is he suddenly asking that??_

“Um, no, no one like that.”

“Hm. same here.”

They stopped by a bench to take a break, both sitting down next to each other. “So what do you do? Do you have a job?” Merlin asked. “I just work at a coffee shop part time, nothing special. And I draw, but I don’t make too much money from that.” Mordred answered. Merlin chuckled at the thought of Mordred doing both of those things. “What do you draw?”

Mordred shrugged, “designs, I guess. Mostly celtic knotwork and stuff like that.”

“I never imagined you to be the art type, but that sounds lovely. I’d love to see your work some time.” Merlin said. Mordred smiled, “Maybe some time.” he said. They sat there a little longer, then began walking again. they chatted most of the time, mostly about their work and books they’ve read. Their hands brushed against each other every once in awhile, and Merlin thought he saw Mordred’s face light pink from it and wondered if his did too. They got back to the where they would split and waved goodbye, then headed in opposite directions on their way back home.

Merlin wasn’t sure what his new bond with Mordred was turning into. He hoped it wasn’t some trick. He hoped it was a good thing. He just wasn’t sure. Merlin kept growing fonder of Mordred, but why? What was happening? He kept on wondering.

Mordred also grew fond of Merlin. He felt like he could be open with him, he felt safe. But there was still something off, something he couldn’t quite get, like a dream he’d forgotten one morning and tried to remember for the rest of the day. Like a lost memory.


	4. Old Friend

****

Merlin and Mordred had gotten closer over the days. Mordred still stopped by the shop every once in awhile. Though sometimes he didn’t go in to look at books, he would just say hello to Merlin and then leave, which Merlin found amusing. They crossed paths often, when out walking on the trail. Sometime’s they’d walk each other home, since it turns out they hadn’t lived too far from one another.

They managed to exchange phone numbers one day. Merlin rarely called or sent messages, but Mordred seemed to be more friendly and sent a “Hello.” or “How have things been going?” occasionally. Merlin wasn’t really used to the whole thing, since he’s tended to distance himself from others and only really communicated over the phone when someone wanted to donate books or something. He didn’t mind it though. He probably wouldn’t admit it, but he was actually happy to have someone to talk to, even if it was Mordred.

Mordred had invited Merlin to get coffee with him on a Sunday. Luckily, that was one of both of their days off, so Merlin accepted.

Merlin arrived at the coffee shop first, instead of walking he decided to take a taxi being that it had started to rain quite a lot. He sat down at a table near one of the front windows. Thinking it might be a bit rude, he didn’t order anything yet and thought it would be best to wait until Mordred got there.

After a couple of minutes Mordred came in through the door, partly soaked. “Sorry I’m late!” he said, walking near Merlin. Merlin stood up to greet him.

“No, no, it’s alright, it wasn’t too long.”

“Oh, that’s good then. Have you ordered?”

“No, not yet. I was waiting for you.”

“Ah, alright then.”

The two of them walked up to the counter and ordered their drinks. Mordred got a dark cherry mocha and Merlin had a latte. Mordred insisted on paying for both, Merlin eventually letting him.

They went back to the table next to the window and sat across from each other. “So, how have you been?” Mordred asked in attempt to start a conversation. “Um, I’ve been fine. What about you?” Merlin responded, taking a sip of his coffee. “Better than most days, I guess…” Mordred looked at the rain outside through the glass.

Merlin tapped at his mug with his fingernails, nervously. “So… Why don’t you tell me a bit about yourself?” he asked awkwardly. Mordred looked back at him and furrowed his brow, “Like what?”

“I don’t know, uh… How old are you?”

Mordred took a sip of his drink before answering, “Twenty five. You?”

Obviously Merlin answer his real age, since even he had lost count of how many years he’d walked the Earth. “Thirty five.” he responded. A grin appeared on Mordred’s face, “Really? You look younger.” he giggled. Merlin raised an eyebrow, “Really?” his face began to feel warm. The younger man nodded, his grin still stuck on his face. Merlin couldn’t help but smile. “Well, thank you.” he chuckled.

“Where are you from?” The older man asked, leaning forward.

Mordred seemed to take a moment think before he answered, “Well, I… don’t remember as much as I should… I was adopted, you see, and lived in Wales for a while.” His grin faded. He was quiet for a moment before clearing his throat and sitting up. “Um, what about you, Merlin?”

“Um, well…” He took a moment to think of something that wouldn’t sound too crazy, “I, um, I’m from England. I… lost a good friend a while ago…” he paused. Mordred’s eyes widened, “I’m sorry…”

Merlin shook his head, trying not to think of it again. “and I, uh, traveled quite a lot after that. after some time I moved back to England and, well, opened the bookshop.” he tried holding back the pain he felt when the thought of Arthur floated back into his mind, and the anger he used to feel towards Mordred. There was a silence between them.

“Your friend, they meant a lot to you, didn’t they?”

“Yes, he did…” Merlin nodded, “Let’s um.. Let’s not talk about it.”

Mordred nodded in agreement, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-”

“It’s okay.”

Their conversations were more awkward for the rest of the Morning. There was quite a lot of long pauses and silence between subjects. the indirect mention of Arthur brought about an old, unsettling energy, in both of them and when they left, the aura still lingered.

Another week had passed and Merlin hasn’t heard from Mordred. No visits to the shop, no messages. Merlin had tried calling him many times and sending texts, but there was no answers. He was worried.

_Is he okay? Was it something I did or said?_

Merlin kept worrying. He thought he’d go pay a visit to see if Mordred was alright, hoping not to find him dead or kidnapped. He tried calling once again, before leaving, still no answer. So he sent a message to inform he was coming. Halfway there. he got a message back:

_“Don’t come. It’s not safe. Just leave me alone.”_

Merlin’s heart raced as he read the words again.

_**“It’s not safe.”** _

 


	5. Stay

Before he knew, he was running, panicking. Something was wrong. “Not safe.” Whatever Mordred meant by that, it couldn’t be good. There was a pain in Merlin’s chest and he felt as though  he would pass out, but he kept going. He eventually reached Mordred’s home and pounded his fist on the door. “Mordred, what’s happening?! Let me in, are you alright?!” He yelled. There was a muffled “Go away!” behind the door. “Mordred, I’m not leaving until I know you’re okay!”

He stopped knocking. He could hear crying from inside, “Mordred…?” Merlin hears the lock click and he stepped back. Mordred opened the door slightly, letting the other man in. As Merlin walked inside, Mordred quickly closed the door. The older sorcerer looked around and his eyes widened. It was a mess. There was broken furniture, all the shelves fallen, broken glass and books scattered across the floor. Merlin looked over at Mordred who’s back was against the wall, covering his tear stained face.

“What on Earth happened?” Merlin asked, his voice quiet. Mordred shook his head, “I-I don’t… I c-can’t… I-I…” He began to cry, “I have such terrible dreams, Merlin… I thought they went away but…”

“It’s alright, shh…” Merlin cautiously moved closer to Mordred. He held a hand out to touch his face, but Mordred flinched.

“No, don’t- I-I’ll hurt you- I can’t control i-”

“Mordred, calm down.” And that’s when Merlin knew. Mordred was remembering. And something else, the mess. He still had magic. Merlin held his hand out, his palm facing the ceiling. He whispered a chant, and his eyes lighted a fiery gold. A blue light rose from his palm and levitated, forming the shape of an orb. Mordred’s jaw dropped.

“You see? I understand.” Merlin let the orb evaporate. He reached out to mordred again, putting his hand on the younger man’s shoulder comfortingly. Mordred threw his arms around Merlin, unable to hold back his tears. “There now… It’s going to be okay…” Merlin said calmingly, lightly pulling Mordred into a hug.

“I’m just so scared…” Mordred sniffed. Merlin pulled back a little so he could look at Mordred. He looked him in the eyes. Those sad, yet beautiful eyes. In the past, he thought that if he’d see Mordred again he’d want to see that pain in his eyes, like the pain Merlin had felt when he lost Arthur. But he didn’t. He wanted to comfort Mordred. He wanted to embrace him and tell him everything would be alright. He wanted to protect him.

He leaned forward and softly planted his lips on the shorter man’s forehead. Mordred could feel the blood rushing to his cheeks and he closed his eyes. After a moment, Merlin pulled back and held Mordred in his arms again.

“Merlin?”

“Yes?”

Mordred clutched onto Merlin’s shirt, “Please stay…” Merlin smiled softly and nodded, “I’m not going anywhere.” 

Mordred gave a weak smile, "Thank you, Merlin..."

"Don't mention it." 

They parted for a second and looked at each other. 

"What now?" Mordred asked, gazing up at the taller man. "I think you should rest." Merlin said. Mordred nodded slowly. "Okay, but..." he took Merlin's hand and squeezed it gently, "You'll still stay, right?"

Merlin chuckled, "What did I say? I'm not going anywhere. I promise." Mordred grinned and stood up on his tip toes to give Merlin a quick kiss on the cheek. Merlin blushed bright red. "I, um... Sorry..." Mordred turned his head, embarrassed. Merlin just laughed nervously, "Don't be."

Before long, Mordred went to his bedroom to rest, pulling Merlin along with. He curled up in the middle of his bed, underneath his blanket, and Merlin sat at the edge. Mordred reached his hand out and poked Merlin's arm. "Um, Merlin..." his face grew red again. "Hm?" Merlin turned his head. "W-... Will you lay with me?" he asked shyly, hiding half of his face with the blanket. "Sure." Merlin said softly. He laid himself down next to his friend. Mordred slowly inched closer to Merlin, until their bodies were touching and Mordred's head rested on Merlin's chest. 

"Merlin?"

"Yes?"

"Can you tell me a story?" 

"A story?"

"Yes."

"What kind of story?"

"Anything..."

Merlin thought, though it was hard when Mordred was so close to him and Merlin felt like there were thousands of butterflies fluttering around in his stomach. "There was once a sorcerer..." He began, "... And he met a prince. They didn't get along too well at first, but the sorcerer was told that he had a great destiny. The sorcerer did everything in his power to save the prince and keep him safe... But he could not stop a prophecy..." he began telling Mordred about Camelot, his story, but did not mention names. He told him about Morgana, as the prince's sister who went evil. He told of when Arthur became king, and Guinevere. He told Mordred of the druid boy, not mentioning it was him. 

By the time he had finished, Mordred had fallen asleep. Merlin smiled at the sleeping body beside him, and felt himself dozing off as well. he kissed the top of Mordred's head, then closed his eyes.


End file.
